I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
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