Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
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