The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
Randomize