well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
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