i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
