What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
You're a waste of cheezeits
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
