Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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