Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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