Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
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I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
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Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
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