There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Randomize
