eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
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