I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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