I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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