before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
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