Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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