some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
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