I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
