Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
