Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
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