I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
