and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
