I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
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