And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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