I am in a vortex of obligation.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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