im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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