I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
