So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
