When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize