Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Drunk is not a location!
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
