he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
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