Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
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When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
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