gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize