Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Randomize