Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
I just googled if crying burns calories
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Randomize
