I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize