Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
I just forgot I was standing up.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
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