If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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