She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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