it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
