Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize