Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I want to fling myself into the sun
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize