i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
I just found puke in my bra..
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
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