you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Randomize
