Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
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12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
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Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
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