He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Randomize
