can we get nightvision for the apartment?
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
We have so much sex to catch up on
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Randomize
