The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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