I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
