Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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