Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
He did a backflip because drugs
Randomize
