i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Randomize
