You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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